No But!

We create the bubble we  live in according to our thoughts
 

Good Morning!

 

It is a pleasure for me to greet you from Dubai and wish you all a Ramadan Kareem
Welcome back to the course The Language of a Happy Life!

 

If you are reading this, then we are in tune, walking together in this fun path that is this party called life is.

 

Maybe you’re not smiling at the fun I see…maybe you feel that your life is not fun at all!

 

If so, this is a great start, recognizing what your reality is, because this fact lets you know where you are and what you feel allowing you to clearly identify if you are in the “I like” or “I do not like” path.

 

Wherever you feel you are, here we are to continue what we started: to invite us to be aware of the way we speak. Together.

 

Two weeks ago I shared my experience with the virus try, and shared how as I replaced it with “Just do it!” my life changed completely …

 

I would love for you to share your experience … so we can learn from you and from what you learned by placing your comments in the box at the foot of this blog. Gracias!

 

Recapping

 

Before continuing I would like to remind you of something very important:

 

The pillar of this course “The Language of a Happy Life” is to focus on how our brain works. Are you a slave of your brain or the captain of your brain?

 

With our attitude we guide our brain.

 

May 15, 2017 we started with:

 

It is not the situation but how I see the situation that creates my reality.

 

May 30, 2017 we continued with the introduction of the power of the word:

 

We are what we speak  (what we say is the reflection of how we think in the Subconscious)

 

June 1, 2017 we continued  with the first virus of the language of a Happy Life: to Try and its antidote Just Do It!

 

Trying only gives us permission to fail.

 

June 1, 2017, today, we will talk about the virus But

 

All of the above is based on a core principle:

 

Our brain is at our service, not the other way around.

  • Our ideas, our paradigms (which are often subconscious) are those that lead us to create images in our image factory, guided by emotions
  • If those emotions and actions are based on the platform of gratitude
    • The images created in our head will be expansive in nature
    • That is, they will make us feel good, at ease
    • We will be more in a celebratory state in which we can neither judge nor criticize. Just listen.
    • The brain will recognize the state of expansion by enabling the gushing of endorphins, the hormone of happiness to celebrate with us
  • If these emotions are founded from the platform of fear, then the images produced in our factory of images will be of contracting nature.
    • We will feel pressured, obfuscated, creating images that threaten our peace of mind and inner calm.
    • Our brain will send the stress hormone cortisol to the rescue

 

With that in mind, let’s continue. Today I want to share my experience with the Virus But, even more devastating than the virus Try.

 

 

The virus But 

 

The word but is like a dagger that destroys a positive thought.

 

It is like having a balloon in which there is a beautiful and positive thought, and by saying but you are guaranteeing its  destruction at the time of puncturing it with the dagger of fear.

 

Example:

 

“My mother-in-law is divine! I love how she loves my husband and the selflessness with which she treats her husband, my father-in-law.”
English 3
Feel how this statement is accompanied by a smile that makes  her and the listener feel harmonious.
 

 

But if you saw how she loves to criticize everything I do? I can not stand her!”

The but virus is used with the spirit to judge ad criticize...you are provoking an adverse situation The but virus is used with the spirit to judge ad criticize…you are provoking an adverse situation

 

This virus word But has completely negated the beauty of the first affirmation, transforming the smile that accompanied it into an unpleasant grimace that brings unnecessary poisoning by excessive not-required-cortisol; in truth there is no threat which we need to escape nor defend us from.

 

However at the time of “stabbing” the joy produced by the image-of-a-lovely-mother-in-law with the dagger-of-but, the protagonist only brings to her present moment “mud, poison” that sends her into contraction infecting also those who surround her into an unpleasant feeling.
good and but Notice the change from Ahhhh…to Yuukkk! caused by the criticizing virus BUT

 

The truth is that we all live in our own bubble:

 

  • The one that we provoke according to the way we speak:
    • in an expansive way
    • or in a contractive way
  • Depending on the nature of the instructions we are giving  to our brain:
    • Grateful feelings will create beautiful images giving instructions that everything is right
    • Fearful feelings will create scary images telling our brain: “Alert, Alert!! sending us into anxiety and discomfort
  • Consciously provoking the order to the body to produce endorphins, that fantastic happiness hormone that sends us into expansion, feeling serenity and harmony, making us able to apply compassion in a conscious state of gratitude.

 

Returning to the scene described above, notice consciously how even you feel harmony when listening to the first part of the conversation:
“My mother-in-law is divine! I love how she loves my husband and the selflessness with which she treats her husband, my father-in-law.”

English 3 Ahhhhh… feeling of expansion, of gratitude…

 

And how you feel in contraction when reading the second part which follows the virus But.

 

But if you saw how she loves to criticize everything I do? I can not stand her!”

English 2 Yuuuk!! Feeling of anger, disgust…here gratitude cannot fit bringing the protagonist to harmful anxiety

 

 

Damage caused by the use of the virus But

  • We interrupt a statement that was making us feel expansion
  • We poison ourselves at the time of unnecessarily sending the signal to the brain that something is wrong, which in return produces cortisol making us feel contracted, facilitating the possibility of generating other negative feelings like fear, anxiety, envy, lack of clarity, distortion of intention, and so on.
  • Blocks our ability to evolve towards more and more expansion as it leads us to a confused and fearful path under the effect of cortisol (fear)
  • It can become a vice, making us more and more addicted to cortisol, setting the foundations for depression
  • It takes us away from the road to positive and constructive actions leading into the path of confusion and anger

 

Yes. Yes. Now the question is:

 

How can I get out of the harmful  effect of excessive cortisol?

 

By changing the script of your movie,  continuing onto the path of gratitude ...

 

 

The Antidote ... and …

 

This wonderful antidote allows you to simply describe a fact that might be considered as challenging. It is the way to ponder things without judging, by simply being objective and to the point, without negating the positive and expansive thought that is behind the word-virus but.

Let’s go back to our negative scenario:

 

“But if you saw just how she loves to criticize everything I do?!!!! I can not stand her!”
English 2 Yuuuk!! Feeling of anger, disgust…here gratitude cannot fit bringing the protagonist to harmful anxiety

 

 

 

What do we need to do so that the sweetness with which we start the conversation continues in that same tone?

 

Simply breathe and thank.. Just  thank. And again, thank.

 

To thank the challenges that life presents us knowing that a greater fortune to the tragedy will emerge from that difficult situation.

 

For example:

 

“My mother-in-law is divine! I love how she loves my husband and the selflessness with which she treats her husband, my father-in-law.”

Notice how everybody feels joy at the positive intention in the kind words of our protagonist Notice how everybody feels joy at the positive intention in the kind words of our protagonist

 

 

“And it’s a fact that she likes to criticize everything I do, because in her mind she only wants the best for her son, and I understand her perfectly.”
Now realize how the ...and... is allowing our protagonist to simply accept that her mother in law seems to criticize whatever she does, however applying compassion the happy bubble simply gets more charged and creative... Now realize how the …and… is allowing our protagonist to simply accept that her mother in law seems to criticize whatever she does, however applying compassion the happy bubble simply gets more charged and creative…

 

Close your eyes and notice the difference you feel by reading purple text or red text.

 

Now, aimed at only describing without criticizing the mother-in-law, our protagonist is in the flow of gratitude and continues:

 

“How grateful I am that my mother in law brought the father of my children to the world. We were born in different times and countries so it is normal for us to think differently. I take what she tells me as a suggestion that may lead me to better understand her son, my beloved husband.”

Now what started as a small happiness bubble escalated, bringing the joy of gratitude into a whole family celebration. Now what started as a small happiness bubble escalated, bringing the joy of gratitude into a whole family celebration.

 

 

Fortunes generated by the antidote …and…

  • We allow ourselves (and others by Contagion) to grow into the expansion that  appreciation provokes deactivating the possibility of judging and/or criticizing  to apply compassion instead by simply listening and appreciating. 
  • We enrich ourselves in harmony by sending the signal to the brain that everything is perfect as it is and sends us endorphins making us feel that sense of expansion that goes hand in hand with “I feel good”, facilitating the possibility of generating other positive feelings such as appreciation, humility, inclusivity, positive creativity, joy, health and many others
  • It causes the natural flow of our capacity to evolve towards more and more expansion, directing us clearly towards the path of what makes us happy
  • It can turn into a wonderful habit making us more and more addicted to endorphins, responsible for our serenity, clarity, calm, peace, self-esteem and therefore esteem of our others. This is world peace!
  • We are prompted to take positive and constructive action, with great desires to share with the others since in this state we are capable of appreciating others just the way they are  being in this expansive state of gratitude

 

How to choose the antidote … and …

 

It is very important to be aware that the most important person for you is you. Yes. Because when you are at peace with yourself you will understand and accept everyone, without criticizing nor judging, feeling the desire to listen.

 

Do you agree?

 

Then do not but yourself up!!
  • If it’s hard for you not to say but, do not get stuck! Let it happen and just realize what is happening.
  • Give yourself the opportunity to ask how harmful you feel this virus is?
  • When you feel the damage this virus does, then you will be able to consciously observe what positive effect it causes on you when you manage to stay in the peaceful harmony that being kind provokes
  • Take a full week to love this kind antidote that doesn’t judge and promotes listening
  • Remember that what you resist persists; just notice when you are about to use BUT and replace it with AND without any further considerations
  • Learn. Learn. Learn …from simply consciously observing

 

 

Remember that you are creating your own bubble. The one that makes you feel good! 

Each one of us lives in the reality that we provoke by remaining in a state of …gratitude (health, abundance and well-being insured) or in a state of fear (illness, lack and unhappiness invited).

 

Creating the fertile ground for making your decision

 

  • Sleep well
  • Eat healthily
  • Exercise your body
  • Appreciate everything and everyone around you
  • Read soul-nurturing books
  • Live Mindfully
  • Talk to Mother Nature
  • Celebrate! No matter what!

 

You choose

 

What do you choose?

What tips shared here will you be applying to your life?
Share with us!

 

 

Stay tuned for more!

 

 

On June 30th we shall speak about the Virus I can’t and its powerful antidote I can

 

Join and help the world be a happier place! Share with us your experiences with the language of a happy life.
 
 

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